These Precious Seconds
by mockingjay-lawliet-paramore
Summary: Beyond Birthday hadn't wanted to watch L take the Kira case. He watched his precious Lawli's lifespan plummet as soon as he made that fatal decision.  LxB one-shot.


**A/N: This is something I wrote that I'm actually quite proud of. LxBeyond, slightly shonen-ai. **

* * *

><p>{L}<p>

"Why am I here?" L whispers to himself as he navigates the streets of Los Angeles. Why was he here? The question repeats in his head as he passes the Los Angeles Asylum. His flame, his exact copy and exact opposite was locked away somewhere within. He presses his hand to the red brick. "B," he murmurs. "What have you done?" He wanders down the street, lost in thought. He is too afraid to visit B. He was afraid of the wild glint in B's eyes. He is terrified of losing what is left of his reason. He is just too scared to face the person who meant the most in his life.

He was the one person who understood L. B was L's duplicate, so they thought alike, of course, but there was recklessness in B that balanced L's seriousness perfectly. But then the murders came. The Locked Room Serial Killings. The Wara Ningyo Murders. The Los Angeles Beyond Birthday Murders. No matter what name was said in the media, they were all a false identity for what they really were: L losing B. B leaving L. Even now, L feels the pressure increase in his head, the longing stabs in his heart, and the trembling hands. The signs that he was only truly alive when he was with B.

He can't forget B, his B, but he can't bear to remember everything that has happened to them. Even as he looks into the future, all he can see is a bleak whirlwind of pain. In ten, fifteen, twenty years, B will still be lost to him, locked in prison.. or worse. With the Kira killings afoot, he could only hope B would not be noticed.

* * *

><p>{B}<p>

The walls are closing in on him, it seems. B stands up and looks out of his postage-stamp sized window. He stares down at the familiar dark, spiky hair. L. Lawliet, 1152004, he reads above the man's head. B stumbles back and collapses on his bed. "Why is he here?" he asks wildly to himself. He remembers the last day he had been at Wammy's House. He had been sound asleep when he heard a wild, strangled scream in the room adjacent to him. L had been having nightmares, a reoccurring one. L always claimed he couldn't remember what had happened before. But that night, B had crept in and sat on the edge of his bed. "Lawli?" he whispered. "What's wrong?" And his Lawli had whispered back, "We.. We were

He sits on the hard bed. He looks at the cheap plastic mirror above the bathroom sink into his reflection. Dark, messy hair and pale skin is the first thing he notices. No, the second thing. The first thing he notices is the crimson eyes. The eyes that can manipulate Death like no normal eyes could. Eyes that can read a person's name, and their death. But the isn't of use to B anymore. He had lost the game a long time ago, and now he is trapped on the 7th floor of the asylum, with only a thin bit of light wavering through the small window. _Trapped, trapped, trapped, _he thinks. Even if he were free, he would be ensnared in his insanity, lost in a world of numbers.

He doesn't know what to do anymore. If he closes his eyes, even for a minute, he sees the taunting, mocking face of the being that won the amusement B had come up with. If he looks outside, he's reminded of death and destruction. If he stares upward, shadows dance and scorn his imprisonment. If he gazes in the mirror, he sees the reflection of the monster he believes he is. And if he listens, he can almost hear the ridiculing voice. "B," it whispers in his head, the voice he hates so evidently and the voice he loves so passionately.

"B." He looks up and gasps. He isn't delirious. There, before him, stands L.

* * *

><p>{L}<p>

He knows he shouldn't have come. He knows that this unexpected visit will only cause agony to both of them. He knows he shouldn't have encouraged anything to B, but he can't help this. He has to see him one more time. He blinks his dark eyes, adjusting to the dim lights. He doesn't want to frighten or delude B with his presence, but he can't stay away. He wonders if his B, if his Beyond Birthday is irritated with his sudden intrusion. L decides not to care. He unlocks the door and strides in.

"L! Lawli…" His awkward use of L's childhood nickname shows just how nervous he is, L muses. He doesn't reply to B. he merely perches on the edge of the stiff hospital bed and hugs B. the gasp of shock he receives is strangely amusing, and B throws his arms around L. Beyond's burgundy eyes close in bliss. L closes his own shadowed eyes as well. He isn't L around this man, but Lawliet, the boy who hadn't seen far more than his fair share of death and destruction. Lawliet and Beyond, L muses. The names of two people who would never be as innocent as their own names were. He holds Beyond out and murmurs softly, "I want you to know this before anyone else. It's something that will hurt a lot, I know, but Beyond, please listen."

* * *

><p>{B}<p>

B looks at L worriedly, and he nervously reaches his hand out and presses it to L's cheek. "Don't be afraid, Lawli. I want..., no, I _need_ to know if it concerns you." He hugs L to his body again. Lawliet runs his fingers through his messy hair and closes his charcoal eyes.

"I…" he hesitates, "I am taking on the Kira case." L's words send shockwaves through Beyond's body. He stares in shock, and then grabs L by his fragile shoulders.

"No! Lawli, how could you decide on something like that? I don't want you to die…" B collapses onto his bed. The room swims before his eyes, blurred by tears. Of course he had heard of the Kira case. They had broadcasted the mysterious mass murdering of criminals around the world for awhile. B has even caught a few guards looking at sites dedicated to the murderer, whom was called "Kira", derived from the English word "Killer". But for L to take on such a task, especially when his life was so blatantly and bluntly at risk? Beyond stares out the window. He didn't take a case unless the stakes were more than ten victims or one million dollars. There have been more than a hundred by now, but Beyond doesn't want to see reason.

"Beyond?" L pronounces his name carefully, softly, as if speaking up would shatter the walls. Beyond doesn't answer. He jumps up and embraces Lawliet in a tight hug. He doesn't want to let go. He doesn't want to lose the one thing in his life that keeps him from going entirely insane. "Beyond… I'm sorry, but I have to do this, even if this kills me. He's targeting criminals, B. You could be next, and I don't want to lose you," Lawli whispers into his ear. Beyond lifts his tear-stained face up to L's.

"I care more about you than my own life. Don't do this to me, Lawli," Beyond says softly. Lawliet closed his eyes. He stands up abruptly and kisses Beyond's forehead lightly. Beyond doesn't look up as the cell door closes behind L.


End file.
